Skip to main content

When I Am Old...

Photo by Daniel German.
I bought a new book yesterday, a new old book, actually. For all of $1, I picked up Ain't I A Woman; Classic Poetry by Women from Around the World, edited by Illona Linthwaite. I got it because of the title taken from a speech given by Sojourner Truth at the Women's Convention in Akron, Ohio, 1851. Sojourner Truth was a force of nature, as natural as they come and as forthright, so how could I pass this up?

I am delighted to discover this book is full of poetry from all eras written by many forces of nature, and I intend to read from it every day—or at least regularly, because you know how these things go. You set out to do something every day, and then things come up and you skip a day and then two and then a week; but I've got more than 200 pages of poetry here, and I'll read it all eventually.

Today's poem is "Warning," by Jenny Joseph. If you aren't familiar with it based on the title, you know it by its first two lines:

"When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me."

I wasn't inclined to read further this morning because I've heard this before, but I did keep reading, and I was fascinated by what this woman warns her friends and family of. She will not only wear unusual and unsuitable things, but she'll also spend her pension on brandy. She'll sit on the pavement when she's tired, make noise in the street, pick the flowers in someone else's garden and learn to spit. In general, she will "make up for the sobriety of my youth." Be warned.

What struck me as I read is the nature of the Red Hat Society, which was born of this poem and of the commercialization of it. You've seen these women, mostly elderly or approaching, wearing purple with wild red hats. They fill up a restaurant every fourth Tuesday or sit in the front row at the local theater en masse. They're your mother and grandmother and Aunt Pearl (I actually have an Aunt Pearl, or did have), and the wildest thing these ladies do is dress flambouyantly and laugh all at once with dessert.

The Red Hat Society holds no appeal for me, but I wonder. If these women were to spend all their money on "satin sandals" and then say "we've no money for butter," I might find them more intriguing. And if they were to do more of the unexpected and socially "unacceptable," like learning to spit and eating all the samples in the shops, as the poem warns, I'd want to be more like them when I am old.

But they don't. They wear red and purple in public and call it enough, or at least that's how it appears on the surface. And they do it in a group. For me, the joy of this poem is in the individual declaration. The woman thinking ahead to her old age when all bets are off isn't fantasizing about forming a club of like-minded women who will no doubt hold her accountable for her actions. She's dreaming of the day when she can shed the shackles that restrain her and reveal her true character. Show me those women who don't travel in a pack because they've been in a pack for too long. Show me the women who are done with it, the ones ready to make their own rules and be judged only by their own expectations. Then maybe someday I'll consider calling myself one of them—

"But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers."

Comments

savannah said…
YES! you've nailed it exactly! that whole "group/pack" thing really grates on me. we're on the same side on this one, sugar! (i just wear my hair long now!) ;~) xooxoxoxo
Speedway said…
It'sa living oxymoron, Scout. The poem is about indivuality but the Red Hat Ladies only do it in packs. I once thought about joining, until I realized 1) I'd have to find someone to sponsor me to join a group, 2) it is all about the partying, and nothing about personal, unique expression, and 3) I can wear purple and red any damn time I want, sometimes even together.

Popular posts from this blog

Am I Stupid, or What?

In two weeks, I will climb up into a charter bus, take my assigned seat, and ride 22 hours straight to Orlando, Florida. I will be a chaperon with the high school marching band, which will perform at Disney's Magic Kingdom--me and 180 people on four big buses for seven days. We will travel together, eat together, play together, fall down exhausted together--and after 22 hours, I suspect stink to high heaven together. Because of the crazy schedule, we will leave Ohio at 6 pm, travel all night and most of the next day, and spend several hours at MGM Studios before ending up at the hotel sometime after 7 pm. After I check in with the eight girls I am to supervise, I intend to shower and shower and shower. I intend to wear clean clothes and socks and brush my teeth until my toothbrush wears out. Of all the things I could be concerned about on this trip, being dirty seems to weigh heaviest on my mind. One of my eight charges could run off and do bad things with her boyfriend, but I'...

No More Mr. Nice Guy

It's good to be a nice person--to say nice things, to do nice things, to write nice things--but I declare an end to the use of the word nice. Nice is what you say when you can't think of any other adjective. Someone shows you a picture of their back yard--that's nice. Someone tells you about their afternoon adventure--that's nice. Or someone describes their childhood in great detail and sometimes with painstaking effort--that's nice. It's a lazy word, and it's non-descriptive. Nice is like mashed potatoes with noodles and chicken gravy all in a big pile on one plate with some canned corn for garnish. Everything is the same color and texture and base substance--starch (this is a favorite Amish dish). Nice is like a partly cloudy day in April when outside feels like inside, and you can't tell a difference between the lighting and the temperature of your living room and the lighting and temperature of your front yard. Nice is a glass of lukewarm water. ...

An Offending Pile

So, I'm standing in my living room letting my mind wander for a minute or two as I stare out the window and watch the day go by, and I see my neighbors walking their dogs down the street. They are nice neighbors who are always friendly and responsible with their property. That is to say they aren't like the other neighbors who heap rubbish behind their house like Ma and Pa Kettle and let their dogs bark for thirty minutes at a time . Anyway, I see the nice people walking their dogs, a big golden retriever who is as sweet as can be and as dumb as a post—he once ate a sock and nearly died before it was surgically removed—and a new golden retriever puppy. Then I see Neighbor Wife suddenly run down the street with the big dog. Then I see Neighbor Husband stopped in front of my house with the puppy on its leash. And then I see the puppy taking a huge dump in my grass. Let me tell you, that is not done in this town unless the dog owner has a plastic bag handy and is ready to pick up ...