Daughter No. 2 came home from marching in the band at a football game, and tucked in her uniform pocket was a Swagger. Swagger is a kind of student-initiated newsletter the kids get to keep them busy on the bus when the band travels for games played out of town, and it's filled with things like crossword puzzles, inside jokes, and interviews with band members.
Last week's edition has a feature entitled Ways to Know If You've Been in Band Too Long. I haven't been in high school band since 1980, so none of this would apply to me. It's for the kids. That's what I told myself as I went through the list and shook my head. So many tell-tale signs applied to me.
• Someone could empty their spit valve on your shoe and you wouldn't care.
There are so many musicians in my summer band, that when we perform at the park, we are crammed onto the stage elbow to elbow. It's impossible to empty your spit valve without dowsing somebody. It's part of the gig.
• You don't describe people by their hair color or eye color or body build. You describe them by their instrument--"you know that flute player?"
In the orchestra, the brass section tends to sit in the back and chuckle amongst themselves, not mingling with the others enough to learn their names. They are, in general, the violins or the cellos or the violas. The individuals aren't important.
• You have a designated section in your closet dubbed "band attire."
Well, I don't have band attire, so to speak, but I do have philharmonic attire. I have certain black pants and certain black tops that I only wear for concerts. I used to have lucky trouser socks that I only wore for concerts--black on black argyle--but I lost them.
• You listen to the classical station and can name off songs that you remember playing.
I do that ALL THE TIME. Sirius Radio's classical pops station plays all the stuff I have played in summer band and some things I have played in orchestra. The puzzle is figuring out which one when the songs comes on. Sometimes I don't figure that out until the piece is over, and sometimes I can claim having played them in both.
• You have dents in your furniture from hitting it with drumsticks or spit stains from emptying your valves.
I don't have dents in the furniture, and I have to say that I don't have spit valve stains either--drained spit does not stain. I often play my horn in the family room and don't mind emptying slides directly on the carpet. Just a week ago or so, husband walked into the room and stepped in a kind of puddle. He cursed the cat for peeing inappropriately, but it was my horn that did it.
When I look at the number of items on this list that still apply twenty-seven years after leaving high school band, I see that being a musician gets in the blood, and the conditioning that comes with playing in a group sticks with you for years and years and years. At least I don't still walk in step with the music I hear. That's something to be proud of, I think. Sometimes it's a challenge though.
Last week's edition has a feature entitled Ways to Know If You've Been in Band Too Long. I haven't been in high school band since 1980, so none of this would apply to me. It's for the kids. That's what I told myself as I went through the list and shook my head. So many tell-tale signs applied to me.
• Someone could empty their spit valve on your shoe and you wouldn't care.
There are so many musicians in my summer band, that when we perform at the park, we are crammed onto the stage elbow to elbow. It's impossible to empty your spit valve without dowsing somebody. It's part of the gig.
• You don't describe people by their hair color or eye color or body build. You describe them by their instrument--"you know that flute player?"
In the orchestra, the brass section tends to sit in the back and chuckle amongst themselves, not mingling with the others enough to learn their names. They are, in general, the violins or the cellos or the violas. The individuals aren't important.
• You have a designated section in your closet dubbed "band attire."
Well, I don't have band attire, so to speak, but I do have philharmonic attire. I have certain black pants and certain black tops that I only wear for concerts. I used to have lucky trouser socks that I only wore for concerts--black on black argyle--but I lost them.
• You listen to the classical station and can name off songs that you remember playing.
I do that ALL THE TIME. Sirius Radio's classical pops station plays all the stuff I have played in summer band and some things I have played in orchestra. The puzzle is figuring out which one when the songs comes on. Sometimes I don't figure that out until the piece is over, and sometimes I can claim having played them in both.
• You have dents in your furniture from hitting it with drumsticks or spit stains from emptying your valves.
I don't have dents in the furniture, and I have to say that I don't have spit valve stains either--drained spit does not stain. I often play my horn in the family room and don't mind emptying slides directly on the carpet. Just a week ago or so, husband walked into the room and stepped in a kind of puddle. He cursed the cat for peeing inappropriately, but it was my horn that did it.
When I look at the number of items on this list that still apply twenty-seven years after leaving high school band, I see that being a musician gets in the blood, and the conditioning that comes with playing in a group sticks with you for years and years and years. At least I don't still walk in step with the music I hear. That's something to be proud of, I think. Sometimes it's a challenge though.
Comments
All of those apply to me too, Robyn.
I don't have the spit stains but I do have dings out of plaster walls and furniture and doorframes from too many late nights carrying flight cases indoors.
And until I threw the whole lot away last year I had a whole rack of appallingly embarrassing stagewear in my third bedroom.
(note to Mum: Do NOT post any photos).
I remember using one of my parent’s suitcases for a drum and eventually ripped a hole through it with the drum sticks.
Great post Scout, marching playing band does most certainly get in your blood. My wife gets such a kick out of just seeing me enjoy being around all that stuff.
She wants me to print it out and I have promised that I will....
Thanks..