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The Town's Loss

I have been putting off writing this post because I am not sure what to say, although I feel I need to say something.

A 16-year-old boy died here on Friday while driving to school. It happened just around the bend from my house on a very curvy, narrow road that we all take to get from here to there. It was built to follow a creek years ago when this part of town was nothing but forest and farms, and for years and years it was a country road with little traffic. Now that we have a big subdivision up in the hills, the old road is well-travelled. It can be fun to take it kind of fast--in fact, my sister-in-law once told my niece when she was planning a visit, "Don't drive like your aunt Robyn."

But there is one curve, a sharp one, where the bank on the left angles down toward the creek with no guard rails, that must be taken slowly. It's clearly marked with two yellow signs. The boy who died was on his way to school, and when he approached that curve at full speed, he lost control, hit a tree, and went down the embankment, landing upside down. He died at the scene.

My daughter and I knew something bad had happened because as we drove down the road, we were stopped by cones the police had set up to redirect traffic, and we could see the ambulance and fire truck ahead. As I turned around to go the other way, I thought of all the kids who live in our neighborhood, not one of them more than 16 or 17 years old, all of them believing they are immortal. I wondered if one of them had been hurt. It wasn't until 10:30 or so that I found out what had happened, although my daughter was told much earlier when an announcement was made at the school.

The high school practically shut down. Everyone was in shock, and the students were allowed to leave at will. When I picked up my daughter, she said the halls were empty except for a few stragglers, and they were crying.

The spot where the boy left the road has now become a memorial with balloons and signs and the school flag. Every day when I drive by there are more kids standing there arranging their gifts and staring at the ground. This has got to be one of the saddest things I have ever witnessed. If every other parent feels the way I do, knowing this could have happened to any one of our children, the entire town must be in mourning.

I don't know the family, but I can only imagine how they must feel, having to bury their child who just left the house one day for school, like any other day. Just imagining such a thing is painful enough--to actually experience it must cause incomprehensible pain.

Comments

Sassy Sundry said…
Ouch. That's really hard, especially since you live so close by. When I was in high school two kids died in separate accidents on a turn that sounds a lot like the one you described.

I'm sorry. That really is just awful.
dive said…
Sorry to be so insensitive, Robyn, but kids driving cars too fast? That's natural selection in action.
Maria said…
God...it never fails to amaze me how kids that age do things that just defy reason.

I remember, though, when I was 16, we lived in Iowa on a long winding country road and my friends and I had this asinine game that we played called "hold on." We would get on the front of the car, hold on to the windshield wipers and the person driving would drive around swerving, trying to make you fall off. If you held on for one minute, you were considered a winner.

A winner? Of what?
Scout said…
It all goes back to that extreme sense of the moment and feeling of immortality, I guess.
Anonymous said…
Robyn, I have also been sitting on a similar post although the beautiful 19 year old died last fall on a very similar curve in a very similar manner. The roadside memorial is haunting and touching but it was even more soul wrenching the day I saw her mom leaning against the very tree that took her baby, with a cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee, as if she were having a conversation with her daughter. I cried off and on all day. I pass that site everyday and I think of the family and how they are doing. I pray I will never be "That" mom!
God bless him. I am very sad about this. It has happened to three parents i know; losing a son in this way and one whose son crashed in a light aircraft with her ex husband. Both killed. The devastation is vast and insurmountable, i'm sorry to say. One of my friends continues working, kind of, but her eyes are far away, her mind full and tears come at every mention of his name. It was three years ago.
My heart goes to his parents, family and of course to the lad himself who lost his life. Very sad.
Gina said…
Around here, everyone is mourning the loss of three little children (3,4, and 5) who were killed when a big rig rammed into the back of the minivan they were in. They never had a chance, as he hit them at about 60mph.

It's horrible to think of what the families are going through.
Very sobering Robyn. I remember when I was a teen I lost two friends to Auto Accidents and going to the wakes and funerals. It still didn't make me drive any more careful etc. I still thought I was immortal. Only with the grace of God did I get by without meeting the same fate.

As a parent of two teens and my oldest is 17 and has no desire to get his drivers liscense. Maybe he knows something I don't.
Maria - I played that game once. You had to be drunk or high to do so.
Miz Minka said…
Oh Robyn, how awful. As much as I love this country and its many freedoms, I wish we would not let KIDS drive. I just don't think a 16-year-old is "developed" enough to safely handle the responsibility of controlling a vehicle. (I know there are exceptions, there always are. But still...) It's difficult enough for many adults. In Germany where I grew up, you had to have extensive driving lessons before you got your license, and you couldn't even take lessons until you were at least 18.
hummingbird said…
Statistics show that younger drivers have more accidents of this kind, but what gets me is the number of adults who drive similarly. There are several incidents around here in the last few weeks where young people were killed in vehicles. . . and it is only briefly stated that they weren't wearing their seat belts. It should make the headlines
THREE KILLED - NO SEAT BELTS.
Instead they emphasize that these were smart children and what a loss. In your situation, seat belts may not have helped, but there should be tougher penalties.
I'm sorry for the loss in your town. I too pray that I never become that mother.
Scout said…
I think several of you have said what I fear--becoming "that mother." It is such a powerful fear that when I see someone else go through it, I can't help but selfishly think it could be me. It haunts me.

And the boy was not wearing a seat belt, which probably would have saved him when his car landed on its roof. One can only speculate.
Oh, how sad. Incomprehensible grief for the parents and community.

I recently heard of an accident that killed two teenagers -- a semi hit them as they were turning into their subdivision after school. They were siblings: the only children of those parents.

The greatest grief is that of parents over children. Perhaps that's why we revere Mary...
Alifan said…
Robyn, how sad, Must admit I fear for many more children on our roads.We have had many die here of late so young, and those left behind always suffer....

When we had our Pub we used to moniter the young with their drinks, and take car keys away from old and young if we felt they had had too much to drink.. after we left we heard of at least 4 young men who had died, not of drink driving, but fast driving,..

I still think that anyone under the age of 21 should have a limit on the size of the car and engine... because they think that passing a test is enough to make them good at driving, mind you that applies to many people on the roads today...

We lost a nephew who died on his motorbike at 22, that was caused by high winds, but the devastation for the family has never gone away...

Take care my dear.

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