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To Chew Or Not to Chew

Lest you all think my town is a utopia, here is an excerpt from today's paper. This comes from the 30 Seconds column, an answering machine people can call and leave anonymous opinions about whatever they'd like. I have mentioned this ingenious feature before. These calls are in response to someone who called a few days ago complaining about how they had been church shopping in the area, and in every service they sat through, people were chewing gum. They thought it was unnecessary and inappropriate to chew gum. Here is the response from the community:

In regard to the person complaining about chewing gum in church, if they were focused on what they should be focused on, they wouldn’t notice the people chewing gum. That’s why people are reluctant to go to church, because of people passing judgment on them. They’re supposed to love and not judge.
EDITOR’S NOTE: Several similar calls were received.
* * *
I would rather see gum chewing in church than smell somebody’s bad breath.



I would add I'd rather see gum chewing in church than tobacco chewing in church.

Comments

Sassy Sundry said…
Well, what kind of chewing are we talking about? The 50s cheerleader gum smacking, or chewing? 50s cheerleader chewing is obnoxious.

And spitoons are inappropriate everywhere. Ick.
1:51 PM
dive said…
Ew.
Sorry Robyn, but gum chewing is repulsive. I'd better add that to my "list" …
2:39 PM
Scout said…
Yes, gum chewing is an unpleasant habit. Not as unpleasant as gum POPPING or tobacco chewing, but still not good, especially if it's the cheerleader smacking Sassy has mentioned. Cows and their cud.

Isn't there a line in Chicago about the popping? "If you pop that gum one more time..."
3:02 PM
dive said…
I'm sure Old K must know of a website with pictures of cheerleaders being smacked.

Waay back when the earth was young I once dated a girl who chewed her food with her mouth open, making that revolting smacking noise.
I lost a lot of weight back then as she loved my cooking but I couldn't eat in the same room …
How on earth do you tell someone you're dating that they eat like a pig?
Luckily, she dumped me before I died of malnutrition …
3:15 PM
Sassy Sundry said…
Picky, picky, Dive. THAT'S why you're still single (just kidding---it is not too much to ask to have an adult chew with their mouth closed).
3:46 PM
Gina said…
We would have gotten kicked out of my Church if we had had gum in our mouths! They were too afraid we would put it under the pews!
11:29 PM
Utsav said…
I'm not a big of the gum either. And chewing on it is fine, but in certain places, at certain occasions, or in the presence of certain people, it is downright disrespectful.

But I like the point- if people were so engrossed in worship themselves, how did they notice? Interesting.
1:18 AM
Utsav said…
Oh and wrong place, but I only saw the altered book posts now. They're fascinating. I can't believe I'd never heard of them till a few weeks back! Love the Poe page- that eye just about sums it all up. Fabulous, I'm amazed at how creative you are.. Thank you for introducing me to this.
1:26 AM
peahen said…
I'll add my vote for 'obnoxious' too. It's horrible to see someone chewing. I think it makes people look arrogant, particularly if they open their mouth. What's worse is putting it somewhere other than a bin.
3:52 AM
Neponset River Bridge Dig said…
I alway bring my own spitoon whever i go to church that way i keep the floors from getting all messy.
9:08 AM
Neponset River Bridge Dig said…
what's with all you gum chewing bashers out there. it's certainly better than smoking. I chew gum a lot and I enjoy it. I hope us gum chewers don't have to by way of the smokers and go outsied in the freezing cold to chew.
9:11 AM
Scout said…
Dive/Sassy, I would have to say eating with your mouth open is far worse than chewing gum, and talking with your mouth full is even worse. That sound is extremely unappetizing--anti-appetizing, in fact.

Gina, I was not allowed gum in church either, or candy wrapped in plastic so that it takes five minutes of noisy rattling to open up.

Utsav, there is a time and place, I guess. And there is a right way and a wrong way. Discretion is the key.

Peahen, some rotten kid put a wad of chewed gum on my daughter's locker yesterday. Repulsive.

Rich, good for you for sticking up for the gum chewer. All I ask is that it be done with grace and consideration.

I prefer mints myself, Altoid Minis--wintergreen. I take them to church and carefully snap open the little metal tin so as not to disturb the pew neighbors.
9:35 AM
Neponset River Bridge Dig said…
oh robyn I can see you now sitting so perfectly in the pew at church with your white cloves on. pulling from your shinny little purse a tin box of altoids. Looking around to make sure nobody sees you, you open the box ever so quietly and peel back the wax paper inside with trying to make any noise at all. You then remove the delectibale mind from the tin and look around again and sneak one into your mouth. closing the tin ever so lightly as not to disturb any other church goers. AAAhhh fresh breath at last. LOL you are funny!!!
10:24 AM
Scout said…
Rich, that's a great description although from a different decade--my mother's I don't wear gloves because then I couldn't bite my nails, and I don't have a little shiny purse. I drag around a knit one my daughter gave me that is made from naturally died wool yarn. I do carefully snap open the tin, though. Today in church, someone took about 5 minutes to open up a little mint, like a Brach's starlight or something. I wanted to find them and club them on the head, the ushers used to do in the 1700s when people fell asleep.
1:18 PM
Anonymous said…
Chewing gum is bad enough. Watching your mother-in-law sit at your table talking, eating and chewing with her mouth wide open is horrifying! I cannot believe this woman graduated from college. She's never worked a day in her life but plays golf, tennis, and shops at Sams Club for cashews to chew on and, of course, her red wine to drink. The picture of her in my head is enough to make me despise her.
11:19 AM
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