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Non-Dream Jobs I've Had

...Jobs that weren't dreamy but did on occasion inspire nightmares:

Burger Chef: counter girl for 9 months. I could close down that salad bar in 5 minutes flat, best record in the joint. There's an entire site devoted to the memory of Burger Chef.


McDonald's: Counter girl for 3 months. The 20-year-old evening shift manager was unkind to me because I didn't like to "suggestive sell." I figured if people wanted fries, they would order fries.


Unnamed office: Typist for 4 months for a shady undefined business that closed down the day after the president of the teamsters union was assassinated mob-style in Chicago. It was unsettling to type at a desk in a room with cameras in every corner, and the boss worked in an office with bullet-proof glass walls surrounded by a bank of security monitors. My father warned me--when he heard it was connected to the Teamsters, he was sure it was "a mob deal."


Cotton Manufacturers Inc: typist for 5 months in a dark, dusty building near Union Station in Chicago--they made bowling ball polishers and table skirts for banquet tables, the pleated polyester things with Velcro tops. My afternoons consisted of typing mailing labels for every bowling alley and banquet hall in the country, and then affixing the labels to envelopes, and then stuffing the envelopes with brochures. The old man who owned the place ate onions every day for lunch.


Frame It Yourself: frame maker and instructor for a do-it-yourself picture frame shop in NJ. The work itself wasn't so bad, but the owner was a pompous bull of a man with horns who lectured me on a daily basis for not liking his approach to just about everything--child raising, marriage, church, politics, food........


Insurance agency: I won't name the agency because the guy was nice enough to give me a job after I walked out on the picture frame jerk. But really, memorizing the ins and outs of homeowners policies, and then filing and stapling and mailing and typing all the related pieces of paper wears out the brain cells. Not for me.


Comments

Sassy Sundry said…
I worked at a McDonald's when I was nineteen. I'm a vegetarian with socialist leanings, and I worked at Micky D's. I hated it. My manager smelled to high heaven of B.O. and looked like Alfred E. Newman. Don't envy those jobs.
Scout said…
Sassy: It builds character--everybody should have to put in time at a McDonald's, if only as incentive for getting a higher education.
dive said…
Wow, Robin. You have seriously paid your dues.
This post reads like a great pitch for an indie movie; maybe Clerks style, or Ghost World a few years on.
I had some nasty jobs at school and college. They'll probably make their way into a post some time (if you don't want too much in copyright fees).
dive said…
PS. I've just noticed my blog has sneaked onto your stalking list.
Thank you so much.
I put yours on my list as "One girl and her horn" (sorry), but I've now changed it to "Scout" after a sudden attack if taste.
Thanks again.
Scout said…
Dive, thanks for adding me to your list as well. Scout does sound nicer than One girl and her horn, I have to say.
Old Knudsen said…
But you can't beat Talkin Smack.
Rob7534 said…
Cool perspective! I've never done the fast food thing, my first real job was in music, and my first real "paying" job was in computers, I'm lucky enough to not have had to work in retail, or behind the counter burger joints.

I'm glad you got out of those places though! The Mob place sounds especially scary! He better let you type behind the bullet proof glass too!
Scout said…
Old Knusdon, Talkin Smack for money would be nice.

Rob, I was too stupid to quite understand the mob place. Good thing the president of the teamster was murdered, though, or I might still be there.
Good post robyn.. when i think back i had some of those jobs they say "Americans will not do" BUT i never ever worked at McDonald's. I applied for a job there back in 1976 when a friends older brother was the manager: he turned me down... when i think about, he was doing me a favor. You may see a post on my site about Jobs I've had.

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